Should I Give to a Pan Handler?

I recently received a tweet from Goodness Magazine a brand new Portland magazine. Their mission: To showcase the many positive accomplishments of those from our community; to use media and each issue of Goodness to create a sense of hopefulness, not helplessness; to preserve the art of storytelling and illuminate the everyday compassion we have for one another. Their magazine provides wonderful uplifting stories as well as concrete ideas for ways you can feel empowered.

The tweet asked, Should I give money to a pan handler? I have often wondered this myself and have not been consistent about an answer. Sometimes I give and sometimes I don’t. The second tweet offered information produced by the  Portland Rescue Mission, a local homeless shelter. I have excerpted some of the main ideas here.  My favorite suggestions were from number five. I  heard a story  a few years ago about a businessman in NYC who  buys loads of gloves and gives them out all winter long to the homeless men and women he sees on the way to work each day.

As panhandlers approach you this winter perhaps you will feel better equipped with this list of proactive ideas.

1. Anticipate the opportunity and be prepared.

2. Smile and actually say hello. Go out of your way to approach rather than avoid them. Acknowledging the person shows respect. It gives dignity.

3. Engage the person. Start a conversation. Take time to listen.

4. Don’t give money. Ask what their greatest need is. If money, what will they do with it? Think creatively about how to help. In most cases, meeting the actual immediate need for food or clothing is best.

5. Offer an alternative. Keep care packages with you that include socks, gloves, toothbrushes and toothpaste, soap, bottled water, healthy food items: like granola bars or gift certificates for food. If you live in Portland, you can print out meal vouchers from the Portland Rescue Mission.

6. Carry public transportation tickets and encourage them to get to shelter for food, cover and other immediate needs.

Ben Martin – Rallying a community!

Last week, our cousin from Michigan sent us video clip a of her son Matthew who is currently a 5th grader. He had been interviewed on the evening news at a fundraiser held by his school to help a classmate who had been diagnosed with a brain tumor. After learning that the doctors felt there was no more hope, the family had elected to travel to Texas to receive alternative treatment at the Burzynski Clinic in Texas.

His community knew since this was an alternative treatment center, the family’s insurance would not cover the costs. They put out an urgent plea and with the help of many of the 5th graders, made posters, created fundraisers and came together to assist the family in paying for the treatment. They felt this was Ben’s window of opportunity, and they wanted to help him.

As I read Ben’s story and heard our young cousin speak about his classmate,  I realized we don’t always know where lives lessons will come from.   There is no way a textbook or teacher could teach these kids the kind of lessons they are learning from this experience. Matthew said, “He got his friends together  and they  collected bottles and cans in his neighborhood and raised $1,300.” These young kids and their parents rallied together as a community to provide a family not only monetarily help but also hope and love. I know that these kids will remember how their classmate bravely faced his treatments  and how their community rallied to help.

I was very moved by this story and so glad our cousin had shared it.

To make a donation towards Ben’s treatment:

If you would like to mail the check rather than present it to Bank of America, please send it to: Family of Benjamin Martin, P.O. Box 120, Novi, MI 48376 .

For additional information, please visit: www.bensfight.org.

Areyvut announces Bnai Mitzvah Video Essay Contest

Daniel Rothner, Founder and Director of Areyvut just emailed me about  Areyvut’s Annual Bnai Mitzvah Video Essay Contest!

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We’re calling all Bnai Mitzvah – Grades 5 Through 10 to share their mitzvah project experiences with the entire Jewish community!

Areyvut recognizes Bnai Mitzvah students throughout the world who have chosen to make a difference by actively contributing to their communities.  First, second and third place winners will be awarded prizes and invited to participate in Areyvut sponsored events.  We will also post your winning video essay on our website as a model for students that are just beginning to plan their Bnai Mitzvah project.

Create a video that captures why and how you incorporated (or will incorporate) the values of chesed (kindness), tzedakah (charity) and tikkun olam (social justice) into your Bnai Mitzvah celebration.

Deadline is Friday, December 25, 2009.

Please be sure to answer the following questions:

* How did (or how will) you make (or will) the values of chesed, tzedakah and tikkun olam an important part of your Bnai Mitzvah celebration?

* Why did (or will) you participate in a service project?

* Why did you choose this project?

* How did (or how will) this project impact your Bnai Mitzvah celebration?

* If you already had you Bar or Bat Mitzvah celebration, how have you continued your project?

Get creative and have fun!

To read more about Areyvut, check out their website.

One Million Acts of Kindness – a Bus Tour

I just learned about Bob Votruba whose mission is to perform One Million Acts of Kindness in his lifetime. The 54-year-old Cleveland native and father of three, has taken his dog Bogart, a Boston Terrier in a converted school bus repainted blue that is their home on the road. His mission to help educate the world on how acts of kindness can transform our world. He is traveling to colleges and schools across the nation to share his important message.

It all started with some stickers Bob created in the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks over six years ago that said Sow only the Seeds of Love. After the Virginia Tech massacre, he was called to Blacksburg, VA  in the days that followed. There he handed out stickers and talked with many people. When he returned home he received many emails and that powerful emotion stuck with him and he decided he needed to share his message in a bigger way.

His goal is to reach out to children, teens, and young adults when their minds are open and their personalities are developing.  He hopes to teach them kindness, empathy and a generosity for others.  By living in kindness they will discover the happiness that they can bring to those around them, and ultimately to themselves as well.   Nothing could be more important in the world than this.

I know that when Bob makes his way to the West Coast we will connect. Check out his website, One Million Acts of Kindness and you can be part of the Kindness Project when he arrives in your city.

A blogger update…

I have been an infrequent blogger this past month. Many of you know that after completing my 1000^th mitzvah I wasn’t exactly sure what to write about on my blog after I had actually completed the project. I originally thought that I would blog about other do gooders but that hasn’t  materialized very well.

Of course, it is true that since I finished my project in May, I  still continued to do mitzvahs and every once in a while engaged in a certain mitzvah  I would think it would make a great blog post but alas I wouldn’t write the post about it either. I spent most of the summer running an auction for a summer camp my children attend. Luckily, it kept me outside a great deal of the summer but not much blogging took place. It was a wonderful experience and we raised more money than any previous auction so that was a great outcome.  I have continued to be a guest blogger for several months now at the Portland Family Monthly blog with posts about parenting, motherhood or my role as a wife.

So what else have I been doing these past few months? Well, I actually have exciting news. In August, I attended the Willamette Writers Conference here in Portland, Oregon. I pitched my idea of a book about my 1000 Mitzvahs project to several people. The response was overwhelmingly positive. I have been working in earnest the past month making sure to create a proposal for my book that would convey what I learned and share some of my favorite mitzvah stories from my project. It is still far from done and I am not solidified on a publisher yet but I am very excited and passionate again about writing and sharing this experience. I look forward to some mitzvah opportunities during my book development experience. That’s a category I hadn’t originally planned on.

Thanks for reading!

Introducing Secret Agent L

Secret Agent L

In my last post, I mentioned that I had begun a Google Alert on Random Acts of Kindness. Last week, I learned about “Secret Agent L” a women in Pittsburgh who after helping a cross country friend celebrate her birthday by performing an act of kindness was bitten by the “giving” bug.

She began a website and got a bit of a buzz on a few other blogs around the country. L and her army of other affiliated agents leave small gifts usually $5 or less in public places with notes attached, explaining that the found object is a gift from Secret Agent L.

“I love the idea of doing it anonymously because it’s so important that I don’t want to focus on myself,” Secret Agent L says. “

Check out her website maybe you can become a secret agent yourself!

Google Alert: Acts of Kindness

Feeling depressed about the economy, the stories you read in the news or see on television?  Why not create  a Google search for “acts of kindness” and have daily stories sent to your email each day. I decided to do this a few weeks ago, because I was looking for information to share on my blog now that I have completed my 1000 Mitzvah project. What I discovered? Each day there are a plethora of positive stories about wonderful people in the world. Each day, I feel gratitude and excitement, rather than depression and sadness.

A few weeks ago, I read a story out of New York. A young women who had been in a car accident sent a wonderful letter to the editor detailing the terrible crash that she had walked away from and the generosity and hospitality that had been extended to her from complete strangers. This was her way of saying thank you to that community.

The week before that there was the story of a jeweler giving out small gifts in his community as an act of kindness as well as a promotion of his company. It was an interesting idea and while he did have a few cynics comment about his tactics, many of the recipients were just grateful for their small find.

As I learn about other interesting stories, I will post them on my blog.

A Lesson for $10

Last week, my family and I were heading out of town for a family vacation. We arrived at the airport and were checking in at our gate. My kids, ages 11 and 8 were at the counter helping us prepare our bags for departure. At the next counter, I overheard a young women, probably in her mid 20’s, explain that she had just lost her wallet and while she had her boarding pass she had no other identification or credit cards.  She asked the agent if the$15 she owned for her one piece of luggage, could be charged to a credit card on file. The agent called over a supervisor to assist in the situation.

My heart went out this this women. I could only imagine a day of traveling with no money in my pocket and no options for something to eat or drink. I guess that is the Jewish mother in me.  Also, I wondered how they would clear her through security without ID.

As we walked away from the counter, I approached her and handed her a $10 bill. I said “I hope this makes your day easier.” My daughter hadn’t overheard the interaction and asked why I was giving this stranger money. I explained what I had witnessed. My daughter questioned how I knew she was legitimate. I explained that I didn’t think anyone would try to make up that kind of a story at the airport these days in hopes that someone would overhear and give them a few bucks. It’s just way to complicated. The women passed us again on the way to security and thanked me gratefully.

While speaking about the situation with my daughter, I realized that $10 is not a huge amount of money. It was an amount I was willing to gamble on this stranger’s predicament. In my gut, I believed she was actually a person experiencing one of life’s less than optimum moments. I hoped that my small gift could somehow change how that day turned out for her. Perhaps when she remembered the day it wouldn’t be as much about the hassle of losing her wallet but about the acts of kindness she encountered along the way.

Bar Mitzvah Boy Collects close to $25,000 for charity

Several weeks ago, I read a story in the Oregonian about a local boy who inspired donations of almost $25,000 for cancer research. Will Rosenfeld celebrated his Bar Mitzvah in May, 2009. He had lost several grandparents to cancer and had been particularly close to a grandfather who had died three years prior.

Prior to his bar mitzvah, he had asked his mom to arrange a tour of a local Providence cancer center. There he learned about a new drug called OX40 that was being researched to provide a better course of treatment for cancer patients. In his bar mitzvah speech, he shared with the 350 guests his personal history of how cancer had effected his family. He explained the drug OX 40 and it’s implications. He compared his grandparents enslavement of  fighting cancer to the Torah portion he was reading that week. Somehow he found a connection in a thousand year old text to something personal in his own life.  Guests from his bar mitzvah sent more than 140 gifts in honor of Will’s Bar Mitzvah. A few days after the  Bar Mitzvah Providence Portland Medical Foundation had already collected close to $25,000.

I was blown away by this article and story. Will showed a maturity far beyond his age.  His request  inspired a substantial amount of donations. Most charity organizations have to plan significant fundraisers to effortlessly receive that sum of money. It is refreshing to see an adolescent forfeiting their own youthful desires to help others.

Mazel Tov, Will!

Spotlight on Spreading Joy Corporation – Race for Matching Grant

Marie Wikle contacted me about 6 months after I started my blog. She is the founder of Spreading Joy Corporation. SJC was created as a non profit whose soul mission is dedicated to remind others of the joy of giving. Marie realized that many people will not “give” because they believe that what they have to offer will not make a difference. She is determined to help remind them that each person is completely capable or Spreading Joy and making a difference in this world.

She encourages people to do one act of kindness a day. Every action effects others and whether it is a hug to a coworker who is going through a rough time  or a $100 financial contribution. Both make such a difference and one isn’t more or less important  than the other.

As a native of Charlotte, North Carolina she is aware of the immense poverty of the inner city children in Charlotte and wants to help these children. Her other goal is to help battered women in her community. Her non profit hopes to help and provide choices for the under served in her community.

Marie is a testament that even when you have your own struggles giving back can help get you through. This has been a tough year for her own family with the economy and her daughter’s medical diagnosis. Yet this morning I received an email that she has just received a $10,000 matching grant to help towards their Back2 School project. Helping local school children with ENTIRE book bags filled with the necessary school supplies. She has 48 hours to achieve her goal. She is asking folks to give just $10 towards this goal. Here is the link: http://www.spreadingjoycorp.com/challenge.html (if the link doesn’t work, please copy and paste into your browser).

I think Marie and I have become friends because like Gandi says we both believe that we can be the change.